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November 9, 2012 by Katie

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!! I hope you all had a great week and are looking forward to some fun and relaxation this weekend! I’m looking forward to… a crazy morning tomorrow with the GOTR 5K and getting all our girls there, get them their bib’s and tiaras (yes, tiaras and no… I don’t get one…) through the run, and back home AND I’m looking forward to actually doing the 2 giant projects that I’ve been avoiding all semester. Well, doing one and attempting to do a bit more of the other (25 page paper…). Haha, great weekend, right?

So today I have some good news and bad news. Okay, well good topic and bad topic. Which would you like first? The bad? Me too.

Yesterday Meghann instagrammed a photo of herself and someone made a comment along the lines of “why would you post an unflattering picture of yourself, not cute.” Meghann then actually wrote a quick post about how she thought about taking it down because it was unflattering (I didn’t think so) but decided not to, because it was real and it was her. I actually also instagrammed a photo of myself with a similar pose and tagged Meghann, trying to show my support for women being true to themselves, no matter how sweaty and unkempt we look. Well, I didn’t find out until later that evening that Meghann’s post had resulted in a lot of… not so nice comments.

photo (6)

So I wanted to say something, something I’ve discussed with other bloggers, but never on my blog: why the mean comments?? What’s the point? If you don’t like someone’s blog, then don’t read it. And by “you” I don’t mean you, my readers, I just mean “you” as in everyone. There’s no need to put all that negativity out there and put someone else down.

These comments are very different from voicing your opinion on a topic. For example, I’m sure many of you might voice a different opinion on this topic from mine, and that’s fine, as long as comments aren’t rude or insulting.

Yes, as bloggers we put ourselves out there, and yes, we’re all open to constructive criticism, but that doesn’t mean people should tear them down. It’s just like in real life: if you think someone looks bad at work/school one day are you going to say mean things to them? NO! So why is it okay to do that on the internet? It’s just an adult form of bullying.

So next time you get the urge to say something rude, resist. Step away. I’m not going to lie, I have mean thoughts. I gossip to friends. I’m not perfect. But I know where to draw the line and I know when to step back and realize my thoughts are probably more about me than them.

I would also like to add in that I’ve gotten one semi-rude comment in over a year of blogging. So THANK YOU to my readers for being so supportive and positive!

Whew. Okay, thanks for letting me get that one out.

Now, on to the good topic! And this is perfect for a Friday, when you’re brain just isn’t willing to work hard anymore…

My friend from KC currently lives in Denver and has a three-legged cat. Yes, a three-legged cat. His name is LaTarian Milton. I am not a cat person, but I actually like this cat. He’s pretty cool. Yesterday she was bored, so she started submitting some pictures to http://catshaming.tumblr.com/ and then decided LT (his nickname) deserved his own tumblr account. This might not last too long, so let’s enjoy it while we can. Here are a few photos (including one of a farm cat, Jack).

My name is LaTarian Milton. I am a thief. I’m ashamed… 

 

“I refuse to get in my cat carrier, so I make my mom use a rolling laundry basket to take me to the vet.” He looks like such an idiot being rolled into the vets office. And yes, I have to use the seat belt to keep him upright in the car. I’m ashamed for him…

 

My name is Jack. I smell like a campfire because I spend so much time in the chiminea. 

 

IMG_0780

Yes, she legitimately has to take him to the vet in laundry basket. I am laughing just imagining it right now.

You can find more of this fun on his blog: LaTarian Milton’s World (and please keep all comments nice… he’s very sensitive).

 

Do you have any crazy pet stories?

 

Have you ever submitted a photo to a tumblr blog?

 

How do you feel about mean comments on blogs?


55 comments »

  1. Wow that’s awful about the rude comments that Meghann got. :( Disagreeing with someone’s opinion in a post and leaving a respectful comment is fine, but it’s never okay to say mean things about someone’s appearance! Unfortunately I think there are a lot of people online who have this vendetta against bloggers and take it a bit too far sometimes.

  2. Personally, I feel sorry for the girl who thinks that only cute pictures should go up on the internet .. What is that?! Half of the funnest pictures I have of myself, the ones that make me laugh when I look back at them, are some of the least attractive. But they make me smile!! That’s all that counts.
    The REALLY ironic thing about all of this (from what I can tell) is that I actually find Meghann’s picture and your picture both VERY cute. You are very strong women who worked hard, got sweaty, and are showing your lovable sides. To me, that’s the epitome of cute/adorable/fabulous!!

  3. I have always been so shocked with the mean comments that some people leave on peoples blogs…I don’t understand how people can be so judgmental. There are definitely things that I don’t agree with that I have read out in blog-land and I would think it is fine to put my opinions about a topic but I would never leave a rude comment about a picture of someone! I am sure the person that left the mean comment is either jealous or insecure.

    And seriously…why don’t they hand out tiaras for races for adults???? I would so much rather get one of those than a metal! Any excuse to wear one of those is good in my book.

  4. We were just talking about this sort of thing in my critical thinking class today. A lot of kids are afraid to post pictures or comments to social media websites like Facebook because they are afraid how people will react and/or judge them. It’s terrible that I go through about 100 photos before I deem one “acceptable” to use on Facebook.

    A lot people come off saying that they are just trying to be “helpful.” Please. Helpful is sending an email where you kindly tell someone that you are a. Concerned about their health and there if you need them. b. Their grammar was kind of messed up, and you just wanted to let them know… We all have those days!

    Helpful is not what those people were commenting for though. Seriously? That photo was not all that unflattering, she was probably coming off an exercise high and feeling pretty good. Blogs are supposed to be somewhat transparent. To let you see some of the ups and downs (not that that picture was a down). They would be criticizing her in the opposite direction if every photo that she posted looked Photoshopped. Urgh. Thanks for sharing that link. It really made me think today :)

    • Katie says:

      Thanks for your comment, and your class sounds right up my alley! I agree, I do the same thing with facebook photos, I actually post a lot of photos on here that I wouldn’t put on facebook! Haha I guess I feel weird putting “Selfies” on facebook but not my blog!

  5. thanks for posting this katie – i totally agree with everything you said. i’m mostly just confused why people take the time to read and comment when all they have to say is negative. and i think the most ironic part about so many of the comments was that people called her picture “juvenile”…ummm and posting mean and hurtful things behind the anonymity ofthe internet isn’t juvenile? i teach middle school and i’m pretty sure all of my students even know that that’s not okay.

  6. Ilove those pet sites, so adorable and I can relate to so many (with the dogs). Mean comments are such a waste of time, why even spend energy insulting another person?

  7. Hey Katie! I just stumbled on your blog. Your cat pictures crack. me. up. I don’t have a cat, but I DO have a very prissy dog (shhhhh… I have to be careful or she’ll hear me). :) Thanks for sharing!

  8. I remember seeing Meghann’s picture and thinking it was really cute! It’s ridiculous to me how some people will go out of their way to say something mean to someone. Constructive criticism is fine, but being downright rude is unnecessary. In the end, it’s OUR blogs, and we post what WE want too. Some people just have too much time on their hands if they want to spend it making mean comments.

  9. In life and in blogging, when people say mean things I definitely try to brush them off. The comments are not ok, but I’m a huge believer in not letting things that you cannot control bother you. It’s easier said than done, but I work towards it!

    • Katie says:

      I agree, it is best to just let it go and not acknowledge things like this, but I guess it just really got to me yesterday and I finally wanted to say something!

  10. I’ve never understood the whole rude comment thing, myself. Personally, I think people who do so are just insecure with themselves and tearing other people down makes them feel better in some weird way! It’s just wrong!

  11. Lia says:

    You know, I have always wondered about that too. The mean commenting thing. I think it is people who are really insecure who follow along on blogs and use any opportunity to try to feel like they, the commenter, are actually in a place to publicly judge the value of the blogger, when, in fact, no person can or has the right to judge the value of any person besides themselves. This public judgement makes the commenter feel superior, like he/she has power, however briefly.

    A blogger should only value mature constructive criticism, or respectful disagreement comments. Negative commenters should be seen as nothing more than people with misguided disappointment, focused outwards, when its foundation is in themselves.

    You have always had a respectful confident air in your blogs, which I believe detracts those looking to feed off of a Blogger’s insecurities from attaching you. I have shared my 2 cents on that.

    • Katie says:

      Thanks, Lia! And very well put. I agree, these mean comments are just the commenter trying to feel better about herself, and aren’t really about the blogger.

  12. I read some of the comments Meghann got and I just couldn’t believe it. You’re so right-I just don’t get the point of negative comments. I think the computer age and social media has given us so many perks, but one of the definite negatives is the rise in bullying. People feel empowered behind their computer screens. I just hope incidents like this are few and far between.

    • Katie says:

      The internet has definitely opened up a whole new form of bullying, and one where people seem be more vicious because they aren’t doing it to anyone’s face.

  13. Meghann says:

    That post got a little out of control yesterday. Readers started to miss the point of the post, and instead just started responding to other comments in the comment section. I wasn’t trying to defend how I looked in the photo, I was defending who I was in the photo and not being afraid to own that. My fear is that when other people read outright negative comments towards bloggers (like when they’re trying to tell people it’s OKAY to not be cute all the time), that they recoil and start to think that they do have to be cute all the time because so many will come at you if they’re not.

    • Katie says:

      Haha honestly, I was scared this post was going to get a little out of control, but I think it helps that I have a smaller reader-base. And that’s why I wanted to address the reaction to your photo – I wanted to reassure women that it’s about WHO you are and how you feel, not what you look like, and being proud of that.

  14. [...] of the blogs that I read, Peace Love and Oats, wrote a post today about bullying on the internet. I want to share the comment that I posted on there with you [...]

  15. This definitely seems to be an issue that’s popping up a lot more now. It’s dicey because everyone is entitled to their own opinion BUT that does not mean you need to be downright rude to another person. Like you said, why bother commenting on a blog if you’re just going to be nasty. Keep those thoughts to yourself!

    On a happier note, you’ve inspired me to create a tumblr for Sonic. Hmmmmmm…

    • Katie says:

      Hahaha Sonic should SO have his own tumblr! And I agree, I had to really edit this post to make sure I was saying people have a right to their opinion, but that’s different than just being nasty.

  16. Christina says:

    I agree with what you said about writing mean comments on others blogs. I agree with Lindsay that everyone has a right to an opinion but at the same time people need to know their boundaries. I feel that people use the internet as a way for self sabotaging people because they are too afraid to say it someones face. I feel that writing rude comments on others blogs is harmful. If you dont have something nice to say then dont say it at all. I love your cat pictures. I also have a 25 page paper I have to write by Tuesday! Good luck :)

    • Katie says:

      That’s golden rule # 2, if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all! I say that to myself all the time!

  17. On Thursdays I always write about the awkward parts of my week, and I always include an awkward photo, there are plenty to choose from. I figure it’s fun and funny! No one is perfect, we shouldn’t expect others to be either!

  18. I don’t understand the motivation behind mean comments either. I don’t get it. I absolutely agree that if it’s something that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face, why is it OK to say from behind a computer? I usually take it to mean that the commenter is unhappy with something in their own lives and needs to take it out one someone and bloggers are an easy target for sure. I like seeing the pictures of real people – not all coifed and airbrushed.

  19. The comment section on Meghann’s post yesterday has to be one of the most absurd things I’ve EVER seen in the blog world. I expect to see haters and trolls get on the more popular bloggers every now and again for what they eat, their level of working out, etc.–not that that is by ANY means okay, but it’s unfortunately happened enough that I know every now and again trolls will pop up and be cruel–but seriously. When I saw almost 200+ comments on the post, I figured they’d be all, “People are idiots! You can look however you want in your pictures!” not all “Well, you look like a child. Who sticks out their tongue? Also, why do you to you have to post that you workout on your blog? And while we’re at it, did you know you make grammatical errors sometimes? Seriously. How unprofessional can you be?!” I’m sorry — when exactly did this turn into a vent session on every little thing that Meghann does that illogically bothers you? Because if we’re going to start talking about how we really feel, your completely uncalled for cruel and unnecessary criticism bothers me about you.

    /endrant

    But really. Totally and completely absurd. I’m not saying every single comment to every single post needs to be all, “OMG I love everything about you!! You are the greatest!!1!1!” but if you’re not going to say it to a person’s face, you have no right to say it online. I’m pretty sure the whole purpose of a comment section is to encourage a thoughtful discussion between the author and the readers, not to be a soap box to vent all your feelings.

    As far as crazy pet stories, I did once have a suicidal goldfish. He tried to kill himself by jumping out of the water twice — once when he was in a small container while I was changing his water, and once when he lived in my parents room when I was in college (he jumped out of his bowl onto my mom’s PILLOW in the middle of the night. She almost died of fright, I almost died laughing when she told me the story. After that, my parents put a cookie sheet on top of his bowl so he couldn’t escape). He ended up dying of old age around the 10 years old — not too bad for a fish that cost me 99 cents!

    • Katie says:

      Haha we have the same frustrations, see why I felt the need to write this post?! And I had a beta fish that died from jumping out of its bowl… so sad. And I love hearing that your goldfish made it to 10 years, Neville is a little over 2 now and everyone is shocked that he’s alive! My only problem is figuring out how to bring him with me whenever I move… (like move states, not just apartments).

  20. GREATTTTTT points Katie! LOVE this. You’re so right. Why is it ever okay to be mean or rude on the Internet?? I think we has humanity are losing our footing in whats acceptable to be said online & what is not. Which is a sad, sad thing. Props to you for being open & honest about this.

    P.s. I think you look GREAT in that pic. And so did Meghan.

    P.p.s something I always like to remind myself of when I hear a rude or mean comment directed towards me or others is this: “I feel sorry for this person. I really do. They are so jealous and insecure they have to post this to make themselves feel ‘better’ about themselves.” As I’ve mentioned in posts before-esp about my ED, my jealousy & or mean /judgemental thoughts always came from a place of insecurity & jealousy. Both are dangerous when taken publicly or online.

    You rock!

    • Katie says:

      Thanks Annette, I knew I had to turn my frustration into a post! And I agree, I used to have such mean thoughts, but I realized I was more upset with MYSELF, it had nothing to do with my target!

  21. I hate mean people – online and in real life. If there’s nothing to be gained from criticizing a person, then keep it to yourself.

  22. I completely agree with you on the mean comments – no need at all. I actually feel quite sorry for people that feel the need to be so nasty – they must be very sad individuals!

  23. Yeah, that’s just rude. I know I looked gross in my half marathon pictures, but I posted them anyway because I was proud of the accomplishment! We’re not celebrities, we’re real people! Why cut others down for their appearance?

  24. It kills me when people post those comments, honestly I wonder why they even go to the blog if they are going to do that. a blog is our space to be us, however we are. we shouldn’t have to shape what we say or feel like we will be judged. I am glad you wrote this, I think a lot of people can relate and want to say the same thing you did. I certainly do!

  25. People love to hide behind a screen name or an Internet identity. It’s the only place where losers feel like they can say whatever they want without taking responsibility for their actions. Those people are insecure, jealous, lonely, or bitter for one reason or another. You have a mass following of positive, fun, and friendly readers, and I’m sure Meghann does too. It’s hard to just brush off an insult or negative comment, but just remember— you’re getting so much more positive energy and feedback than anything else. Haters gonna hate, but haters are losers. That’s not super profound or pin-worthy…but it’s true. Haha, have a fabulous weekend! =)

  26. Liz says:

    I once slept in my bathtub because my foster dog was sick and I didn’t want him to ruin the floors or my bedding. So I instead slept in the bathroom with him! Not my best moment ;)

  27. [...] Happy weekend! First of all, I wanted to say thank you to all of you for your great comments on my post yesterday. It sounds like many of us of similar feelings and frustrations when it comes to mean comments on [...]

  28. i cant believe people sometimes.. following you and alot of other blogs for some time now and sometimes when i see what people say in the comment section or even just HOW they say something just makes me cringe.. like i just dont see the point! im a hair dresser so were always having to do our best to please customers and i love mine, but some of them come right in and will say wow you look pregnant today, or dont wear your hair curly it makes your face look really round.. and i just stare at them and laugh it off and its not the comments themselves that bother me its the fact people think who they are and will come up and say what ever, whether you value their opinion or not.. people are ridiculous! have a good weekend though!

  29. Kierston says:

    I just wrote a post about Trolls.

    Don’t feed them and rise above the negativity!

  30. Caitlin says:

    I read through all those comments on Meghann’s post and was shocked at how mean and rude people can be. I was seriously flabbergasted by it. Thank you for being a good friend and sticking up for her in that absurd situation- I agree that it’s a form of adult bullying.

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