Catching Up... March 2019 Edition

It’s been a while since I’ve shared what’s actually been happening in my life so I thought I’d do a “catching up” post and let you in on a few things that I’ve been doing.

Lots of skiing

If you follow me on Instagram, you probably know that I spent a good deal of January and February skiing. I took a trip to Deer Valley in Park City, UT to ski for 3 days and spent two nights with my friend, Annette! It was a lot of fun to see her as well as really great to get to go back to where I grew up skiing on spring breaks as a kid.

A couple weeks later, I took a solo trip to Aspen where I stayed for one night in Glenwood Springs and skied Friday at Aspen Snowmass and Saturday at Aspen Mountain. It was beautiful out there and I’m glad I got to experience somewhere new. Plus I finally got to try out the hot springs that a previous coworker of mine told me about so often.

THEN I got to have a fun day at Copper Mountain with another friend of mine, her husband, her dad and her dad’s friend. Despite many debacles in the morning, I ended up having the best day. Yes, I enjoy getting to ski even if I go alone but it was a ton of fun to get to go with them and enjoy the slopes together. My friend’s dad also used to be competitive skier, so it was nice to have him give me some tips and guide us around the mountain.

Last but not least, other than a couple solo ski days, I went to ski in Taos with my friend, Maddie! Well, I spent the whole weekend in Santa Fe with her but on Saturday we went to Taos and despite some questionable weather, we had a lot of fun.

Cars are expensive

Oh man. I never owned a car until I moved out to Colorado and I’m sure all of you already know this but CARS ARE EXPENSIVE. I was in an accident back in November and I’ve luckily been reimbursed for all of those expenses (not at fault) but once that dust (almost) settled, I discovered I was very much in need of new tires. $900 later, I had those and then needed windshield wiper fluid (okay, super cheap) and new windshield wipers. A few days ago my key fob stopped working too… Luckily I have two :). And very soon I will be getting my car registration information for April and will have to pay that… I know, I’m complaining. I’m very lucky to have a car in the first place but MAN! I had no idea… Any other newer car owners out there?

I should probably start marathon training soon…

Yep, that’s right. I’m running another marathon after a 7 year hiatus. I’ll be running the Chicago Marathon with the Cholangiocarinoma Foundation, which is the cancer that my aunt passed away from this past October. If you’d like to donate to our team, you’re welcome to do so here! I’ll be running with three of my cousins and one of their boyfriends. I’m excited to be doing this with them but also kind of terrified of actually doing all the training again… Wish me luck!

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I’ve been going to spinning class as a substitute for running but I’ve really got to start actually running. I’m thinking about joining a gym nearby (I found one for $10 a month!) just so I can run indoors. I feel like I might be far more incentivized to run inside than outside while it’s still cold and snowy. I’ve really softened up since those days of winter running in Chicago…

I’ve become a needlepointer!

I know, random. My cousin, Emily, loves needlepointing and learned from her mom. I decided to try it out on her recommendation and did my first project from KC Needlepoint. I was hooked!! When I started looking for new designs to do, I struggled to find anything that really fit my style. Then I discovered that there are many young women who are painting their own canvases and I thought, I could do that! (My favorite is Thorn Alexander). So I did. I painted my first canvas and it was horrible. Then I replicated it again as a second draft and it turned out pretty cute! I’m stitching it right now to see how it looks but so far so good!

I’m honestly just making this up as I go with a few YouTube videos so I need to find a class or two and learn some new stitches, but I’m having a lot of fun with it!

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Anxiety is the worst.

I don’t know what exactly has been triggering it, but my anxiety has been a bit worse over the past couple of weeks. I share this not for sympathy but to keep it real because I know so many of you probably deal with the same thing. I’ve been finding ways to numb out instead of deal with it and that’s not the best! This month, I’ve decided to focus on me and dealing with my fears (aka journaling them out, praying, letting go of my own expectations) rather than accomplishing all the things. A lot of my anxiety stems from the feeling that time is slipping away and I’m not making the most of it - does anyone else feel this way? You’re not alone!

I’ve been watching the Bachelor

Do you like that I mentioned this? I do because it’s quite a commitment for me to watch these episodes every single week since I don’t actually have cable. I’m also listening to the podcast The Wright Reasons after each episode which I realize seems extreme but I love their take on what’s happening. Kyle and Rachel Wright, husband and wife obviously, don’t just recap the show - they actually talk about the relationship dynamics and the mental state of the girls. Rachel is a marriage counselor and licensed psychotherapist and they both run the Wright Wellness Center, so they have a really good take on what’s going on (or at least what the producers want to show us…).



There you go! A few highlights from the past two months. Hopefully I manage to do this more often… If you want a more up-to-date look into my life, be sure to follow me on Instagram.

"Come As You Are" - National Eating Disorder Awareness Week

This week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week and I felt a pull to share a bit of my story. This topic is something I am passionate about as I lived so many years of my life with some form of disordered eating.

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What’s most important is to know that you don’t have to fit into a clear category, like anorexia or bulimia, to have an eating disorder and you certainly don’t have to be thin or look “sick.” Eating disorders come in all shapes and sizes.

How did I know I had a problem?

I was obsessed with food and my body and these obsessions were interfering with my daily life.

I went through years of eating far too few calories and exercising far too much. If I missed one day, I would feel so much anxiety. I feared eating out because I didn’t know exactly what was in my food. I never ordered what I wanted but ordered whatever I thought had the lowest amount of calories on the menu. I hated social situations that involved food and I also avoided anything that would involve late evenings and alcohol because I had to be up and in the gym or on a run the next morning.

It's not surprising that so many “Healthy Living” bloggers have struggled with eating disorders because an easy way to cover them up is to say you’re just trying to be healthy. Yes, eating nutritious foods that make you feel good is great but being afraid of not eating “healthy” for fear of gaining weight is not great.

About a year ago I looked at my first few years of blog posts and felt so incredibly sad. The food I ate and shared was a clear indication that I had a problem yet, I thought I was being so healthy. Seeing those posts brought up so many memories and how my obsession with food only worsened my struggle with anxiety and depression and caused me to isolate myself from others.

I was never quite “thin enough” to cause alarm despite thinning hair and losing my period (although I’m sure a few people noticed some changes). I actually started gaining weight after a couple of years of this behavior because my body’s metabolism shut down and started to store fat. Yet, my mind was still in that same place and even more panicked now.

Eating disorder recovery is rarely a straight line. I have had swings towards a positive relationship with food and then swings back in the other direction. But if you look at who I was back then and who I am now, the difference is huge. The freedom is amazing. I no longer think about how much I can or cannot eat. I don’t go out to restaurants afraid of what to order. I eat things like a pizza (and a WHOLE pizza), pasta, bagels, candy, etc., without thinking twice or feeling like I need to burn it off the next day. I relish in taking days off working out and sitting on the couch to watch movies instead.

Even more than not worrying about food anymore, I have my life back. I can focus all of that time and energy on other more important things and relationships. Instead of being a woman who constantly puts herself down and believes she’s not good enough, I’m working towards being the confident and thoughtful woman I really want to be and know I can be.

Why am I sharing all of this?

To let you know that if you’re experiencing what I’ve been through, you’re not alone. And that making it to the other side of an eating disorder is 100% worth the effort and difficulty you go through to get there.

For more information and other people’s stories, here are a few great blog posts:

All of my blog posts regarding disordered eating

Answering Your Questions About Eating Disorder Recovery (lots of great links here too!)

Friend to Friend → Being Underweight and Amenorrhea

ED Posts from The Real Life RD


I am NOT a doctor, dietitian, psychiatrist or any kind of specialist. I am simply sharing my personal experience. Please reach out to a specialist or someone you trust if you think you might need help. Also, visit https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support for more information on finding support.

19 for 2019

One of my favorite podcasts is called Happier, starring sisters Gretchen Rubin and Elizabeth Craft. Fun fact: they are also from Kansas City and I went to the same school that they did! Not the same time but I still think it’s pretty cool…

One “happiness tip” they suggested both last year and this year was to create a list of things you want to do that year. Instead of choosing a few big resolutions, this list comprises of specific action items, which puts a lot less pressure on overhauling a part of your life. It’s called “19 for 2019,” which means you pick 19 things you want to do.

Rule #1: You don’t have to finish the list. Check off the easy things first to get the ball rolling but if something doesn’t happen, you’ve still accomplished so many other things.

Rule #2: Your list can change. Life changes and your list should change with it. For example: I wanted to take a trip out of the country last year but with both finances and figuring out kidney donation testing, it was no longer a priority.

Rule #3: Have fun with it! Put things on your list that you really want to do and don’t worry about what anyone else thinks.

One item on last year’s list was to ski 10+ times!

One item on last year’s list was to ski 10+ times!

So what’s On my list?

  1. Run the Chicago Marathon.

  2. Raise $2,000 for Chicago Marathon.

  3. 25 push ups on my toes.

  4. Paint my own needlepoint canvas. - halfway there on this one!

  5. Write at least 2x per month on my blog.

  6. Increase savings account to __.

  7. Go on 10 dates.

  8. Go to a concert.

  9. See a live musical, play or ballet.

  10. Write a fiction novel.

  11. At least one yoga/stretching session per week.

  12. Make $1,000+ with Beautycounter.

  13. Visit Sarah in Wisconsin.

  14. Visit Elizabeth in NYC.

  15. Visit Maddie in Santa Fe two times.

  16. Buy a new bra that I love.

  17. Go to a Bingo night with Lea. - scheduled!

  18. Happy hour or speakeasy with work friends.

  19. Go to a Chiefs game.

Another “18 for 2018” was to visit my friend Julie in Dallas!

Another “18 for 2018” was to visit my friend Julie in Dallas!

See? Some things are big and honestly might not happen and other things are small and easily accomplished. It’s helpful to put something you want to do on a list to create more of a commitment. My coworkers have been talking about doing a happy hour for well over a year and we never manage to schedule it. Now I have an extra incentive to take charge and make it happen!

The other pro of this list: it keeps you from forgetting the things you want to do. Seeing on my list that I want to visit three different people reminds me that I need to plan ahead and shouldn’t wait until the last minute or put it off saying I forgot and don’t have time anymore. It might not work out but I know this list will push me to at least try.

Finally, putting your goals in writing helps you commit to them more than if you just think about them. You can see them laid you in front of you and you could even print off the list, stick it on your fridge, and put a checkmark (or sticker) on it each time you finish a task.

If you were to make a 19 for 2019 list, what are a few things that you would include?