On Twenty Eight

Oct 30, 2015

I don't think I've been this ready for a birthday since I was a kid. Not that I'm excited to get older, necessarily, but for the first time in a long time, I'm not dreading it.

Don't get me wrong, I've always LOVED my birthday. Who doesn't love a day to celebrate them? What I didn't love was the feeling that I was never enough - that I hadn't reached the place in my life that I wanted to be by that age.

When we're young, we often think forward to our adult lives and imagine things like getting jobs, getting married and having children. I remember thinking, probably when I was 14, that I planned to get married around 24 and start having children when I was 26 or 27. The thing I didn't realize back then was that you can't plan your life out in advance; life just doesn't work that way. We aren't even guaranteed tomorrow, let alone having our first born at the specific age we would like.

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But because I had expected my life to be a certain way by my late twenties, every year that passed and I was no closer to that dream made me feel like a failure. It made me feel like there must be something wrong with me; that I'm doing enough or being enough.

So why is this year different?

This year I welcome twenty-eight with open arms - I have never been more self-assured than I am now (except 2nd grade... that was a solid year). Not to say everything is going smoothly and I'm as happy as a clam, but never before have I felt so confident in myself. I love who I am. I love myself. I know that God made me for a reason and that I am loved in this world, that I am needed. I have a direction, a purpose and a mission. I get to use my heart and my creativity, my gifts from God, in serving others and that brings me a great amount of joy.

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I am enough. I am exactly where I am meant to be right now. I will keep growing and changing. I have no idea where the next year will lead me, where the next ten years will lead me, and that's okay. I don't need to know. I don't need a year-by-year plan. I just need to follow my heart and live my life

Don't let yourself be limited by societal norms. Don't feel bad because you're not doing everything the same way or with the same timing as everyone else. Just be you. You're doing just fine.

Happy Birthday to Me :)